| 2008 viewing | ||
sunday Spaghetti Horror Feast Day 3 |
Deep Red / Profondo Rosso +
Arguably the apex of the giallo genre, Dario Argento's Deep Red mounts a phantasmagorical assault on your senses. There's psychic powers, bloody murder set pieces, incredible camerawork, a delirious music score by renowned Italian prog-rockers Goblin, Daria Nicolodi as a nosy reporter having a bad hair day, David Hemmings as the nervous foreigner in Italy who becomes obsessed with solving the murders, black gloves, explicit clues including a shot of the murder's face early on, a twisted plot centred on childhood trauma, and the now characteristic double-ending. This longer Italian version is recommended because it contains additional flirtatious comedy between Nicolodi and Hemmings. |
 1975 DVD | Manhattan Baby / The Possessed +
More Fulci fun. The budget of $1,000,000 got cut back to a mere $300,000. That's OK because Mr. Fulci's inventive moviecraft pulls this one to the finish line. Eventually. As inept and ridiculous as this is, I find this meagre level of Italian horror filmmaking very entertaining. That's not to say Manhattan Baby isn't slow and dull; trust me, you'll need to guzzle three cans of Redbull per reel to keep your eyelids from slamming shut. As for the movie, which I vaguely remember from a local VHS rental viewing under the title The Possessed (aka Eye of the Evil Dead), it concerns some Egyptian curse that torments a nuclear family via a mystical pendant handed out by hags with white contact lenses on their eyes. Given the time it was made, this malarkey was obviously inspired by Poltergiest, Raiders of the Lost Ark, and any number of lesser 70s and 80s supernatural fare. Standout scenes include one gory bit in which an historian's face is pecked full of bloody holes by his reanimated stuffed birds. Another dude is impaled on steel spikes inside a boobytrapped pharoh's tomb – not much blood here, though. One special feature of Manhattan Baby is Giovanni Frezza, aka 'Bob' from House by the Cemetery, as the spiritually harrased kid. There's also plenty of wooden acting and duelling eyeball zooms. Ahhh, such priceless garbage. Yet more proof that I lead an utterly pointless existence. |
  1982 DVD |
Don't Torture a Duckling +
The nights of terror bolognese binging continue. After the accomplished intensity of Shock, this early flick by Lucio Fulci feels like a letdown. The story, nominally a sordid giallo tale with the obligatory animal reference in the title, has boys turning up murdered in a picturesque rural community, done in at the hands of an unseen killer. There's the inevitable red herrings and twist-ending, but Fulci manages to maintain interest levels with mesmerising shots of an elevated highway, casual female nudity, strange interludes, and gratuitous violence in two scenes: one woman gets a severe beating (shades of the opening scene from The Beyond) and the demise of the killer who, as I probably stated in the previous capsule review of Don't Torture a Duckling, gets chucked off a cliff and has his/her dial gouged to pieces on the rocks in slow motion. Now that Lizard in a Woman's Skin has been released on DVD properly, I'm very keen to see it. |
1972 DVD |
sunday Spaghetti Horror Feast Day 2 |
Shock / Beyond the Door II +
The last film by the late and great Mario Bava is a slow but gruelling exercise in psychological suspense and terror. It stars Italian scream queen pin-up Daria Nicolodi (ex-partner of Dario Argento) as the neurotic mum whose son channels the spirit of her dead husband. What really happened when he committed suicide? Watch this gothic Edgar Allen Poesque chiller to find out. Bava really knew how to photograph women – Nicolodi never looked more ravishing than she did in Shock. He also knew how to engineer neat film special effects on a shoe string budget. Some of the scares still get me. The alternative title refers to an earlier film by Bava called Beyond the Door aka Lisa and the Devil, starring Telle Savalas. Modern maestros of the macabre like Takashi Miike seem to have been inspired, in part anyway, by Bava, and Shock in particular, which also predates Tobe Hooper's Poltergeist. |
1977 DVD | Dellamorte Dellamore / Of Death and Love +
Don't ever use the dreary US title Cemetery Man. Michele Soavi, the director of this lauded zombie film with a difference, as well as The Sect, The Church and Stage Fright, had acting stints in Dèmoni and Lucio Fulci's City of the Living Dead, to name two examples. He's better off behind the camera, given his wooden performances in said titles. Dellamorte Dellamore is one of the most beautifully shot and lusciously visual horror movies ever made. I have the excellent Italian anamorphic release from Medusa, but I believe there are now several classy DVDs on the market place. I won't sum up the plot, because I can't. Just be warned that there is a degree of slapstick comedy and bizarre, unexplained phenomenon mixed in with the light gore and eye popping nudity, which can all become a bit exhausting if you're not in the mood. Best to wait for the right time and take it all in. Astute commentators have written about references to Citizen Kane and other movies buried (or not so hidden) in the narrative. Soavi was hailed as a master of horror after Dellamorte Dellamore was released, then promptly moved on to other genres. |
1994 DVD |
Demons / Dèmoni +
Lamberto Bava again with his most successful 1980s horror film, an amalgamation of Evil Dead and a number of cheescore horror titles from the early 1980s. The lurid story shows what happens when a cinema full of patrons turn into demons one by one. This results in numerous gore highlights and icky demon make-up. The acting is dubbed Italian cringe at its best, with Bobby Rhodes as a pimp talking like a blaxploitation hero, and one bimbo in the movie-within-the-movie saying lines such as "Nostrodamus? Sounds like a rock group to me" with a straight face. Demons was a fixture in the golden age of R 18+ VHS rentals. Familiarity has dulled its edge a bit – definitely a choice for nostalgia viewing or to show friends what tacky 80s horror was all about. Also remember to turn up the volume for the pulsing rock score by Claudio Simonetti from Goblin. Now, I guess I should see the two sequels at some stage, huh. |
1985 DVD |
Macabre / Macabro +
The directorial debut by Mario Bava's spawn, Lamberto Bava, was inspired by a US newspaper story about a woman who kept the head of her lover in a freezer after a freak car accident decapitated him. Thus Macabre continues the necromantic themes of Beyond the Darkness, transplanting them into a New Orleans setting (via the suburbs of Roma). Bava handles this tabloid material with restraint and seriousness, that is until the histrionics and queerly Italian approach to depicting grotesque situations begin to dominate the narrative. An odd, though memorable, entry in the latter Euroshock cycle, and a definite collectible. |
1980 DVD |
saturday Spaghetti Horror Feast Day 1 |
Beyond the Darkness / Buio Omega
Not really expecting much, I was blown away by this sicko classic from Joe D'Amato (Aristide Masseccesi to his mum), the "master of sleaze" as the cover of my Dutch import DVD proclaims. For once, that's not just hyperbole. The story, such as it is, concerns an irritable young taxidermist called Frank whose girlfriend Anna dies in hospital. Inevitably, he steals Anna's still-warm corpse from the cemetery to embalm her (cue infamous naked corpse gut removal scene with bonus heart lovebite), then keeps her snug in bed. Yes, Frank has 'issues'. Spoiling his post-mortem romance is the sexually frustrated female housemate, who seems to be a relative of some sort. Frank tells her off with memorable dialogue such as, "Get out of here you old slut". But she's not all that bad to have around, because one time she helped Frank to dismember a hitchhiker he picked up (cue infamous naked corpse acid bath scene with bonus melted head bobbing up out of the foam). I won't spoil the other surprises, suffice to say that Beyond the Darkness aka Blue Holocaust aka Buio Omega is a bona fide cracker. (Sorry, but part of being Eurocult royalty is having 30 alternative fucken titles for any given movie.) Oh yeah, Goblin did the music score. |
1979 DVD | Zombie III
Oh, those crazy Italians. Here's the first movie in my Italian horror festival. The idea was to play some sentimental favourites, dust off purchases I'd made years ago, and watch titles I have but a foggy recollection of seeing. Zombie III falls into the last splattergory. Nominally a sequel to Zombie Flesh Eaters, the once great Lucio Fulci was stuck in the Philippines with a crappy script, 99.9% humidity, and an unspecified illness. And holy cow Batman, does it show. It's got overacting, non-existent lipsync, a guilty army general saying lines like "That's ridiculous...pure science fiction", an eco-conscious DJ (tenuous link to Zombie Flesh Eaters), a flesh melting virus called "Death One" that gives its victims the worst cases of acne you've ever seen, a cast who gets beaten up doing their own stunt work, sloppy cinematography, video inserts of salvaged gore scenes, a flying zombie head, the obligatory helicopters and horny soldiers, and on it goes. In retrospect, it's actually got tons of cool stuff going for it. Sitting through it is another story. Of course, pathetic specimen that I am, Zombie IV and Zombie V must now be procured to complete the set. |
1988 DVD |
thursday |
Smokin' Aces +
About 10 mins of story telling and 20 seconds of violence is missing from Smokin' Aces. I don't care how many times the director says in public that he's happy with the final product. Ten minutes and twenty fucking seconds is my conservative guesstimate. And so, here we have the DVD, which is identical to the theatrical version I saw a few short months ago. That is very sad...one can only assume the writer/director of the excellent Narc is already busy working on his next projects. Another comment concerns the song 'Ace of Spades' by Motorhead. Shoot 'Em Up also featured this track. Hello to Bob Shay and Newline. The IMDB message board topics say it all: "#1 Worst Movie of 2007", "End Doesn't Make Sense (Spoiler)", "Hollis on the roof??", "Horrible piece of *beep*", "Alicia looked good...just a little bit chubby." |
2006 DVD |
wednesday |
Shoot 'Em Up
"Guns don't kill people, but they sure help" – Paul Giamatti. Coming home from work at 8:30pm midweek...what's better than a dose of mindless ultra-violence? Well, the lurrrve of a good woman and a bottle of hot sake, perhaps. Sadly I had to settle for a video store rental, namely this somewhat over-hyped entry in the cool gunplay genre. Yes, the writer/director is a big fan of John Woo, which means you can't take anything here seriously. Over the top is the order of the day. Some positives include Clive Owen, Monica Bellucci, and Paul Giamatti in the lead roles, a welcome subculture vibe, a huge body count, and lots of bloodshed. But too much of it consisted of bad guys getting hit and doing the 9mm Tango, or just falling down. The gory stuff only made an appearance during the final shoot-out in the fast food restaurant. That's the flick I wanted to see. Too little too late, and other review clichés. There are worse ways to spend 83 minutes, I suppose. G'day to the teenager who petitioned the Aussie censors to reduce the R 18+ to an MA 15+ so he could see it at the cinema. |
2007 DVD |
sunday |
Fargo +
Was curious to see how it held up to No Country for Old Men. It does so very well. If there is a longer version of the newer movie that fixes the jumpy nature of some of the narrative leaps, it might equal Fargo, which is perfect as it is, right down to the fake "This is a true story" title card that kicks off the film. |
1995 DVD |
saturday |
Cloverfield
This monster movie uses the 'found film footage' device employed by the likes of Cannibal Holocaust (1979) and The Blair Witch Project (1999). Here it is digital video of likable young people living in New York who're caught up in the havoc unleashed by a military experiment gone wrong codenamed "cloverfield". Technically Cloverfield is quite accomplished, with good production values and seamless special effects. Unfortunately, all of the camera work is of the handheld HandiCam variety, which means you could develop unpleasant nausea symptoms within 20 to 60 minutes – two punters on my right walked out after the first reel. For the last 45 minutes, Code Monkey and I had to close our eyes or fix them upon objects in the cinema, otherwise we wouldn't have been able to last. Most annoyingly, the camera shake is far worse than it needed to be. Some may also find fault with the way the story spends too much time on human interest dramas. I thought the down-beat ending justified the investment, but ultimately think Cloverfield does nothing that umpteen cheesy Godzilla movies haven't done before with less pretence. And for the second time this week, I watched the Brooklyn Bridge being destroyed. It's getting old. The implied metaphor of a beast created by the military wrecking Manhattan 9/11-style is fun to entertain. |
2007 cinema |
sunday |
Atonement
Based on the novel by respected literary scribbler Ian McKewan. Atonement the movie is an absorbing though weighty story set in 1935 about two youngsters who fall for each other, that is until it all goes wrong – as it always does. The plotting is a bit lopsided, and some of the middle scenes drag. By the end, though, you do come away satisfied. Just be warned that this is not your typical lovey dovey feel-good movie; that alone should be enough of a recommendation. |
2007 cinema |
| I Am Legend
Oh shit, Akiva Goldsmith was involved in writing the screenplay. What we have here is a missed opportunity to film Richard Matheson's great novel properly. The end result is not even on par with the 1970s adaptation The Omega Man starring Charlton Heston. It's more like 28 Days Later, with an idea stolen from Mimic (an attempt to cure a disease backfires) and bits of other genre films tossed into the mix, namely Night of the Living Dead in terms of the house under seige and the basement refuge device, and Day of the Dead with the lab experiments using captured zombie specimens. Other aspects just don't make sense. For instance, if Manhattan was isolated, how did the other immune humans get there? Another contrivance has Neville going nuts and not recognising one of his own traps. Because the infected humans are just rage zombies, the whole vampire society thread from the novel is absent, which means the memorable refrain from the book ("Come out, Neville!") is never heard, nor is the famous last line. Newcomers to the story should enjoy the tense atmosphere generated by the film, and Will Smith does an OK job, even if he's not at all convincing as an army colonel. The rage zombies (people and dogs) are all CGI, naturally. And what about gore? Well it seems you can film a zombie movie without showing much violence. Who'd have thought? But perhaps the biggest kick to the gonads for audience members comes from a bullshit 'God to Me To' element in the third act that leads to a hopeful ending. Ahhh, just fuck off... |
2007 cinema | |
saturday |
Wimbledon
The reviews were vicious, but I couldn't understand it. How do you stuff up a basic romantic yarn with A-list and B-list stars? By making it boring and insipid, that's how. Wimbledon was duller than a bad porn movie. Attempts to make the tennis scenes exciting fell flat – the real thing is so much better. Even die-hard chick flick fans (and I might be one) should skip this flop. Further more, Jennifer Connelly was upset that her "cheese eating, scotch drinking" hubby became all buff for the movie. What can one say except the girl has a great attitude. Or maybe that was her subtle way of saying the script stank? Both are true, I suspect. |
2005 TV |
sunday |
Rosemary's Baby
Another Ira Levin adaptation, this time by a far better director in Roman Polanski. Rosemary's Baby is a perfect movie version of a novel; in fact, it is acknowledged as one of the great literary adaptations to cinema ever made. Every shot is perfect, much of the action and dialogue is from the book, the subtle touches are well executed instead of betraying prudishness, and the limited but effective grotesqueries lead to a disturbing and poignant climax. The print used for Warner Brother's DVD could have been better: it looks chalky, and reel change markers are present. There's two decent making-of featurettes, one filmed recently and another from 1966. Lastly, thinking back, I remember putting on this DVD years ago, but suspect I fell asleep during the first 20 minutes, so the failed attempt was probably made during a recovery day. Sorry Roman. |
1967 DVD |
| The Stepford Wives
Based on the Ira Levin (RIP) novel of the same name, The Stepford Wives is one of those adaptations that is strictly a by-the-numbers affair. Nevermind that the similie "like a Stepford Wife" has entered modern parlance. The 1975 film is only notable because of its failings – given the time period, this should have been social nitro-glycerine upon its release. Sadly, screenwriter William Goldman had his script watered down further by D-list UK director Brian Forbes, who misjudged the source material (script and novel) and imposed his own changes, enough it seems to defuse the book's limited frission-laden content. I'm not sure what the remake with Nicole Kidman does with the original source material. I can admit now to being slightly curious about the redux, because this original is a missed opportunity, despite Katharine Ross' huge wet manga eyes dominating the movie. Given what her character knew of the machinations, it's remarkable that she was not able to do more, e.g. clobber Ike (William Prince) upside the head with that fire poker. Pffft. Not knowing the story beforehand would make it more enjoyable, I suppose. The local DVD seems to have been taken from the same grainy source print as the US Anchor Bay DVD, judging by remarks from Heathen. |
1975 DVD | |
monday |
Crimes of the Future
Once again shot silently on 35mm, Crimes of the Future picks up where Stereo left off. There's more 'science' commentary that proffers bursts of psychoanalytical word salad about speculative maladays and diseases. This outing is more accessible, thanks to use of Eastman colour stock, and a narrative that accidentally resembles a real story. Many themes Cronenberg elaborated on later in his career can be glimpsed in Crimes of the Future, although I find its hippy overtones and more familiar surroundings less rewarding than the minimalist, abstract (and not to mention boring) quasi-futurism of Stereo. One element to enjoy is the noise soundtrack. Plus I must say that these three Cronenberg curios are presented impeccably in the same two-disc set from Blue Underground. It's not foolish to guess that Crimes of the Future and Stereo have never looked better on home video than they do here. Fast Company comes with another essential Cronenberg audio commentary track. |
1971 DVD |
| Stereo
I'd love to say that these two experimental films – this and Crimes of the Future – by David Cronenberg are unsung masterpieces, but they are not. At 61 minutes, both are rather difficult to stomach. I prefer Stereo because, shot in black and white and lacking any sound effects, it is the more extreme of the two. The stark cinematography and bizarre pantomimes (they don't match the voice-over) slip into the realm of David Lynch's early short films, though with the sterile and detached eye of a brain surgeon armed with a camera and a headful of avant-garde notions. Think Michelangelo Antonioni after suffering a stroke. The brutalist architecture amongst which Stereo was shot, combined with the parapsychological waffle, makes it a memorable enough experience. Just. |
1969 DVD | |
sunday |
Fast Company
Ah, the things you find in JB Hi-Fi these days. David Cronenberg made Fast Company after Rabid and before The Brood. It's all about the world of drag racing, the only motor sport (or any sport for that matter) that doesn't bore me to tears. Not knowing what to expect, this ended up being an engaging little picture. Like all of Cronenberg's films, even the arty ones (see above), there is utterly no hint of pretension, just earnest performances and a straight forward style designed to pay tribute to the subject matter without getting too melodramatic. |
1979 DVD |
| No Country for Old Men
I'm sorry – Fargo is still better. Though slightly overrated, the latest Coen Brother's movie is nevertheless rousing entertainment. It is also the most violent and suspenseful mainstream movie to hit cinemas for ages. Having said that, the Coens just stop themselves from being seduced into exploitation territory by shooting a number of the latter death scenes off screen. That annoyed me no end, but it probably gained the film its positive response from critics; a fine line to tread. The ending is also unexpected and disappointing. I'm sure it's pregnant with thematic poignancy, and it's good to be surprised sometimes – I'm all for that. However, in this particular movie, it felt like a total cop-out given what had happened earlier. So with that caveat in mind, git yo' ass down to the nearest multiplex and eyeball this bugger pronto. |
2007 cinema | |
wednesday |
Ferris Bueller's Day Off +
To purge the memories of those insipid modern day comedies I suffered through late last year, I picked this classic off the DVD shelf and chuckled more during the first reel than I had during all four previous movies. That says it all. It's interesting that there's also many dark, negative and melancholy aspects to Ferris Bueller's Day Off, so much so that if you added them up, they'd probably outweigh the humour. That is why it works so well: balance. |
1986 DVD |